These last few weeks have been about house showings and soul searching. I still have that compulsive feeling of needing a plan. But everything is happening, planned or not.
My husband brought home an X box two weeks ago. We share a 550 square foot apartment. And life as we knew it has changed. I’ve gotten used to the sounds of World Cup soccer announcers, crowds cheering. I’ve been baking more.
We saw a house on a quaint street right downtown. It was unofficially organized into units. Unofficially because the second floor was an apartment, but there was no lock (actually there was no door) at the bottom of the stairs. The backyard and laneway access had been blocked by a massive garage / workshop. They were running a business out of there – signs maybe. I won’t even name the price – it had seven digits.
The interesting thing was that there were two realtors. He was bold about the price, and about insisting I leave my full name and phone number on his piece of paper in the kitchen (claiming this was for security reasons). She was more dismissive of the price, saying there was room to negotiate, more than once.
That was two weeks ago and it’s still available. In Toronto these days, you sell in 8 days or 40+. Generally speaking.
I could live in that house. I could live in the garage, actually. I could live anywhere. Sometimes I wonder if my Grand Plan for the house I will own is for me or for someone else.
We saw another house on the market for the same price. It was a former manse, built in the 1800s, not too big but big enough. It had very old grape vines out back. And needed new everything. It was on a nice street and it was the best thing I’ve seen for months. Our realtor said you’d be better off demolishing it and starting fresh than trying to fix it.
Now I’m shopping for better pieces for storage in the apartment. I might as well continue to make it more liveable, seeing as our cautious optimism about finding a home we actually want to commit to (financially and otherwise) is running low. It’s turning into un-cautious pessimism.
But really, if two adults and an X box can live comfortably in 550 square feet, then we (the two adults) have a great shot at forever. Plan or no plan.
Maybe the house we land in won’t be planned for. The Grant Plan has a lot of holes, after all. The only thing we’ve agreed on is a garage and two parking spots. It’s a big ask in downtown Toronto.
Here’s a challenge: plan less. Plan less today, and be grateful for what comes.